Apostasy

Pictured, an illumination, "The Abbot and the Apostate Monk."

This post isn't about Mahony, or other bishops or clergy, it comes about as I've pondered and prayed for friends who have left the Church over the years.

One day in the monastery, the novices were discussing a priest who left the Church to get married, he was highly regarded by the community, and considered very spiritual. He left, not only to marry, but to be a part of a protestant ministry.

I recall protesting, "How could anyone leave the Church with Jesus truly present in the Eucharist and after receiving so many mystical graces?" That was said by a rather fervent, as well as naive, novice in a contemplative monastery. Just a few years later, when the breast of Divine consolation was pulled out of my mouth, I faltered for a time, afraid of the dark night, seeking my consolation elsewhere.

Certainly, the defection of some ought not to surprise us, yet charity compels us to be concerned, and to pray for them. Nevertheless, each man chooses his path. Some of my friends remain Christian and live devout lives, albeit outside the Catholic Church. Some have abandoned religion all together for a lifestyle incompatible with Church teaching. While others have embraced neo-paganism, wicca, or witchcraft. (The later were usually converts from the "old religion" in the first place.)

In 1 John 2;18, the Apostle writes of the presence of antichrists in these final hours:

"It was from our ranks that they took their leave-

not that they really belonged to us:

for if they had belonged to us,

they would have stayed with us.

It only served to show that none of them was ours."

I think of the parable of the wise and foolish virgins, those who awaited the bridegroom in the night of faith, the wise having their lamps ready, while the foolish neglecting their lamps only to wander off to obtain the oil of consolation and light elsewhere. While away, the bridegroom returns and the wise virgins joyfully enter the wedding banquet as the doors are locked behind them. When the foolish virgins return, they understand they have become persona non grata, and are barred from entering. It seems harsh doesn't it? The Beloved Disciple tells us they "never really belonged in the first place" while the parable confirms eternal life is denied the apostates.

One friend in particular cannot accept the idea of a God who permits suffering, unable to understand, or accept the concept of original sin, while adamantly rejecting the fall as a condition all men inherit. The idea of a Savior, redeeming mankind, by his perfect sacrifice is no consolation. If I understand things correctly, many mystics and Church Fathers feel one aspect of Satan's rebellion pretty much involved the same difficulty. Not that he didn't believe - he simply rejected the Incarnation and the Redemption. He voluntarily rejected God in disobedience because he could not bear to hear Him, (which is the root of the word obedience, "to hear") Satan, refused and rebelled against God's plan - which is pretty much what my friend is going through now.

It seems to me, any apostasy finds its archetype in Satan's apostasy. In the garden he invited Eve to eat of the fruit of the tree, encouraging her to reject God's plan for mankind, assuring her that she would be all knowing as God. Convincing her that God had deceived and cheated Adam and Eve of a greater beatitude. (Now I believe Adam and Eve lived as saints, enjoying a Divine Union and beatitude unlike any saint or any of the greatest mystics, except for Christ and the Blessed Virgin.) Truth be told, our first parents were deceived and fell from grace.

Theologians, as well as philosophers, tell us there is a natural consequence, even chastisement for every sin or act, proportionate to its gravity. The sin of our first parents was a serious act. Scripture tells us God walked with Adam in the garden, Adam knew God intimately, therefore God would have clearly instructed him about everything - albeit, warning him not to partake of the fruit of that particular tree. Adam and Eve knew what they were doing, just like you and I know what we are doing when we chose to commit a mortal sin - it would not be a mortal sin if we did not have full knowledge and complete consent of the will. Strangely, we can know what constitutes a mortal sin, while understanding its consequence, yet we commit the sin.

The original sin of our first parents was so severe, so grievous, it altered our nature, affecting all of nature, so to speak. Subsequently, in procreation, the effects are regenerated not unlike an imprint upon our DNA, if you will. It remains the condition of human being before baptism in Christ. At least, in my simplicity, this is how I understand it. Is it fair? Yes, because of God's justice, as well as His mercy and love, which immediately provided an antidote, the Savior. Did God do this to us? No, we did, or rather, mankind in our first parents did it. The only analogy I can use to comprehend, much less explain it simply, is to compare it to what we know today as regards some children born with physical or mental defects through no fault of their own.

My best analogy is the mother who drinks heavily during pregnancy, and runs the risk of giving birth to a child with birth defects. The child she conceived did nothing to cause the malady, and sadly, it is in reality, the fault of the mother, even though she may never intended to harm her child. Despite her motivations, the effects of fetal alcohol syndrome affected the baby in the womb. The results clearly are a natural consequence, a severe chastisement if you will, upon an innocent child. My example is simple biology, yet I believe it fits my analogy with the supernatural generation of man.

We cannot comprehend God with the intellect. We cannot grasp the Trinity, the Eucharist, the Resurrection and other mysteries except through faith, experienced in love, while persevering in hope throughout the difficulties of life. Theologians and mystics can describe and explain the mysteries of faith, nevertheless, everything presented to us by the Church requires the assent of faith. The wise virgins of the parable held onto this faith, their hearts burning with love, while awaiting the bridegroom in patient hope. We all must pray for perseverance while preserving our faith through prayer and good instruction in charity.

My poor explanations to my friend, just as the Catechism and the scriptures, along with the writings of the saints and Fathers, have been rejected. They are just words. Just words. I'm nothing but a simple man myself, without great education, I just don't know how to posit the faith any better than I've done.

It is indeed sad when a soul falls away.

In the monastery the monks always conclude night prayer with the intention, "And for our brothers who are away." Pray for my friends who are away.